Moms Unite – Go Postal!

Note: Kelly, one of our talented designers on the Design Services team, is responsible for the idea behind this satirical post while Steve took the liberty of writing it down. Have to give credit where credit is due!

Mothers Against Cruel and Inhuman E-Mail (MACIE) have united in an all out effort to save our Post Office from being shut down and succumbing to rapidly evolving technology.  For years these dedicated mothers have been asking their children to call, write a letter, and drop a line all to no avail.  These desperate mothers have tried guilt tripping with the age old, “What if I die tomorrow and haven’t heard from you in three days routine?” Yet, children still have not given in. Ms. Nogo Digital, the leader of MACIE said:

“I have been begging my son for years to stay in touch with me.  He sends me e-mails, but I can never remember my password. I’ve asked why my password has to be so complicated when I’m the only one that will be checking this e-mail. Why can’t it just be ‘password?’ He won’t explain! I’m worried he’s involved in some sort of cult with how much he knows that the rest of us don’t know. What the heck is a Google or a Yahoo anyway?  Sorry I digress.”

Obviously very passionate about her stance, Ms. Digital asked for a few moments to see if the mail had come. Day after day she anxiously awaits the mailman, hoping that today is the day her son will see the light. After all of these years, she hasn’t given up hope.

“I just want to hear from my boy in a civilized way, the old fashioned way, with a letter that is delivered by my old friend Ferris the postal carrier.  Ferris is very sad these days as he keeps reading about how much money the postal service is losing, how his hours will cut, what will happen to his pension, where will he take his afternoon nap and of course will he still be able to eat Mrs. Nuggets chocolate cookies every week.”

Let this be a lesson to us all. Let’s save Ferris, save the postal service and save these countless sons and daughters before the echoes of angry mothers’ voices, yelling at them for not staying in touch, begin to drown out the subtle sounds of nature and cloud our ability for rational thought.

Buy a stamp and send a letter.  Do it now!